Mirrors not Windows

They said that the king was so full of sorrow, that he never smiled again. It’s the old, famous Welsh fable that I heard a while back from a preacher, And it’s a fable about Welyn the Great, who was the prince of Wales during the 13th century.

In the story, Welyn is given a dog named Dellert, from King John of England, Who is a dog that is known for his loyalty and protective nature. And so the prince puts the dog in charge of guarding the room where his baby boy sleeps. And guard the room the dog does! For every time the king would return to his son’s room, the dog was always there alert and on guard, Which gained him the nickname, the faithful hound.

But then, on one particular day when the king returned from a hunting trip, he went to see his baby boy, And when he did he discovered something that struck fear into His soul! For not only was the cradle was overturned with the bedding strewn all over the floor, But the ground was covered in blood… with the child nowhere to be found. And then, the king saw something he couldn’t believe, For their stood Dellert, with his mouth covered in blood.

For a moment he just stood there, bewildered at what he saw, But then, rage suddenly overcame him and he pulled his sword and plunged into the dog, instantly killing him. And as the dog gave out his final whelp, the king heard another cry from the corner of the room, where he saw his baby boy, Rushing over to his child, he found his son unharmed lying next to a dead wolf. And that’s when the king realized the blood on his dog was not the blood of his son’s, but the blood of the wolf, For the dog had not harmed the child, but actually saved him. And upon realizing this, the king was so full of sorrow that he never smiled again.

Church, have you ever misjudged a situation? Have you ever been so absolutely certain of something, only to later discover that you were (heaven forbid) wrong about some of the facts? That you were a bit too quick in your conclusions... That maybe you didn’t know the full story, But by the time you came to realize it, it was too late, For you had already drawn your proverbial sword and struck the person down in judgment...

In response to this kind of behavior, Jesus says in Matthew chapter 7:

¹ “Judge not, that you be not judged. ² For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you.

Matthew 7:1-2 ESV

In this passage, Jesus is warning us of the dangers of wrongful judgment. He’s warning us not not take out our swords, and start swinging them at people as judge, jury, and executer. Because if we do swing the sword of judgment at others, Not only will we cause great harm, But when it comes to swinging the sword of judgment, as Scripture says: “He who lives by the sword of judgment dies by the sword of judgment” And as Christians who have been spared by the sword of God’s judgment, how dare we pick it up and swing it at those whom we have judged.

For not only is it:

1. Dangerous (v. 1-2)
2. Hypocritical (v. 3-4)
3. Unhelpful (v. 5-6)

1. Dangerous (v. 1-2)

Now, as I’m sure you’ve realized, this isn’t Matthew chapter 24. Which is a passage we last looked at about a year-and-a-half ago. And we returning to this passage this morning, not because I wanted a lighter study week, But because I am convinced that as a church body, we desperately NEED what Jesus is teaching here. And so this morning, we are going to do something we haven’t really done before, Which is pause our sermon serious in order to have a family discussion based upon Jesus’s Words in Matthew chapter 7.

For the past three years, I’ve been given the immense and wonderful privilege of serving you as your pastor. And I really do mean that. For it has truly been a joy and a privilege. And, one one hand, I really do believe we have something that is special and unique here as a church. But...I must say that I am convinced we have a very serious systemic problem that MUST be treated if we are going to be a church that accomplishes much for the kingdom, Because if we don’t address this issue, no only will be a useless church, but this issue is so serious it threatens the very existence of our church. What is the dangerous issue I’m talking about? It is judging others.

As a pastor, it’s your job to step into messy situations on weekly basis, and do your best to speak the healing truths found in God’s Word into those situations. and after three years, if I had to pick the one thing that is the most common issue that causes hurt in our church body, its the issue of judging wrongly.

A year and a half ago I warned us of about this when I said that when it comes to things that will rip a church apart faster than anything, judging others is in the top takes the cake. And I can tell you I see the truth of that now more than I do then. and so this morning we collectively as a church NEED to take this very seriously, Which means, On one hand, if you think you’ve got a problem with this, embrace the conviction that Jesus’s words bring. But on the other hand, recognize this isn’t about sniping any one person, Because as I said, it’s a COLLECTIVE problem we need to work on as a church family. it’s not just one or two people, In fact, one of my gifts God has given me is forgetting people’s faults quickly, But as I prepared this message, I was reminded by numerous difficult situations that have ALL largely resulted from the sin of judging others.

So on one hand, don’t take this personally, But on the other, I want us all to take this personally, by using God’s Word this morning as a MIRROR, NOT A WINDOW in order to judge others! Because the last thing we need, is everyone leaving today thinking: “Boy, I’m glad I’m not so judgy like those judgy people!” STOP IT! DON’T DO THAT! Don’t get judgmental about judgmental people! Instead, hear Jesus’s Words and say in your heart: “Lord, use this as a mirror to show me my sin.”

Alright, Disclaimer given, So why is wrongful judgment such a dangerous thing for a church? A lot of reasons, But, one reason comes from the expression “Don’t judge a book by its cover?” Because that’s exactly what judging is! It’s looking at one thing and swinging the sword of judgment without having all of the information. “Oh, look at how they dress…” “Look at the car they drive…” “They they are again without a job… they are so lazy...” “Did you hear they like that theologian or that pastor.... I bet they aren’t even saved....” “Did you see their kid in church today… what terrible parents!” And with all of this, we are judging a book by its cover. Which is not only incredibly arrogant, but it’s incredibly foolish! Because in this, we are drawing conclusions that we have absolutely no business drawing.

If we going to avoid doing this, we have to recognize that our perception isn’t always the reality, Sometimes it’s just our perception, which is often not even close to 20/20 VISION!

Have you ever one side of the story, and then drew a different conclusion once you heard the other side? Proverbs 18:17 talks about this, when it says:

¹⁷ The first to speak in court sounds right - until the cross-examination begins.

Proverbs 18:17 NLT

We’ve all done this! But... sometimes, by the time we hear it, it’s too late, Because by that point, we’ve already started hacking away at someone based upon what we heard first! And even though this hacking away has only been done in your heart and head, TOO LATE, the damage has already been, as your heart is now convinced of the person’s condemned nature, regardless of the new facts your head has introduced!

And so if we are going to avoid the dangers of WRONGFUL JUDGMENT, we have to learn to train ourselves to NOT jump to premature conclusions, We have to learn to not SOLELY LISTEN to the first voice we hear! And who’s voice is it we usually hear when we make false judgments? It’s our own.

We’ve used this illustration before, but how this can sometimes look, is you say hi to somebody at church, and they just walk on by without a word. And within 5 seconds, your heart has constructed an entire narrative for why that happened! It’s because they are rude, It’s because they don’t like you, and in fact, now that you think about it they’ve never liked you! AND THIS PROVES IT! And then all of sudden you start remembering all of these other pieces of information that fit with that uncharitable narrative, Like the time they didn’t sit by you at church, Or how they didn’t send you a Christmas card, Or the time you walked by and they laughed with those other people, and you just know they were talking about you and laughing about you, and you know that because they happened to look at you for a second right after it happened!

And that whole time while you were busy in your little ole make-believe world, you never even though of the fact that A. They never heard you say “Hi” in the first place,

The only reason you didn’t get a Christmas card, was because their kid accidently spilled their juice over the last card that had your name on it, and in the midst of the chaos they forgot to remake yours,

And C - They were actually laughing about something silly they did recently at work, and they just happened to catch your eye as you walked by. But no, none of that matters, because your heart told you all you need to know about the person, Which is that THEY ARE A BAD PERSON! And you know this, because you’ve got an all-knowing, omniscient, heart.

¹⁷ The first to speak in court sounds right - until the cross-examination begins.

Proverbs 18:17 NLT

Can I be a little blunt here? Your heart is going to tell you things that isn’t true. And when it does, Church - WE HAVE TO LEARN TO NOT LISTEN TO IT! WE have to REGULARLY TELL IT TO SHUT IT IT’S ARROGANT, LYING MOUTH! Because, your HEART IS A LIAR! It’s going to want to believe that your perception IS THE REALITY, It’s going to want to believe the uncharitable narrative! - because that’s what your sin nature has programed it to do! But the reality is, it’s just your WRONG perception! And if you think the examples I gave a moment ago are exaggeration, THERE NOT if anything, there are an extreme UNDER-EXAGGERATION to the kinds false-judgments that damage and divide a church. Maybe someday I’ll write a book with all of the wild examples we pastors see of this… yeah… maybe not.

⁹ The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?

Jeremiah 17:9 ESV

The truth is, we all make assumptions, and those assumptions are OFTEN, if not usually, just flat out wrong, and they get us into serious relational trouble. And so we have to train ourselves to NOT listen to the first voice we hear, Which yes, it’s sometimes other people - and we certainly need to shut that slanderous gossip down, But often times the slanderous voice we are hearing is our hearts! And so we MUST masters it.

¹⁷ The first to speak in court sounds right - until the cross-examination begins.

Proverbs 18:17 NLT

If we are going to see victory in this, we must learn cross-examine our own hearts, by not only refusing to listen to its uncharitable perspective, BUT, by speaking a charitable perspective into it! and - asking others to help us in this area when we are failing Spouses Friends Church family

1 Corinthians 13 is often called “the love chapter” of the Bible, And in it, the Apostle Paul writes:

¹ If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. ² And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. ³ If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing. ⁴ Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant ⁵ or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; ⁶ it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

1 Corinthians 13:1-7 ESV

What Paul is saying here is that “love gives the benefit of the doubt.” It doesn’t impatiently jump to conclusions, It doesn’t arrogantly insist that it’s perspective is all-knowing! It doesn’t enjoy looking for wrongdoings in others, by always taking the negative perspective as the only perspective! LOVE looks for a CHARITABLE PERSPECTIVE AS MUCH A POSSIBLE! And it doesn’t just look for it - IT FIGHTS FOR IT! It tells the heart: “NO -YOUR NEGATIVE PERSPECTIVE CANNOT POSSIBLE BE THE RIGHT ONE!” And love says this because love genuinely WANTS the good explanation to be the TRUE explanation of the person.

But when it comes to those outside of our tribe, this is NOT something that comes naturally, ~Not even for Christians. Which is why we must FIGHT FOR IT, by fighting the warped, sin-darkened perspective of our hearts, which delights in seeing gray as black.

Do you know one of the reasons we do this? Because it makes us feel SUPERIOR It makes bolsters our pride when we push others down to build ourselves up! And so we naturally LOVE THE DARK NARRATIVES that our hearts tell us! We easily and quickly LATCH ONTO THEM - and if you think you don’t, you’re just blind to the nature of your own situation.

C. S. Lewis brilliantly wrote about the heart’s love for the darker explanation, saying: “Suppose one reads a story of filthy atrocities in the paper. Then suppose that something turns up suggesting that the story might not be quite true, or not quite so bad as it was made out. Is one’s first feeling, “Thank God, even they aren’t quite so bad as that”, or... is it a feeling of disappointment, and even a determination to cling to the first story for the sheer pleasure of thinking your enemies are as bad as possible? If it is the second then it is, I am afraid, the first step in a process which, if followed to the end, will make us into devils. You see, one is beginning to wish that black was a little blacker. If we give that wish its head, later on we shall wish to see grey as black, and then to see white itself as black. Finally we shall insist on seeing everything - God and our friends and ourselves included - as bad, and not be able to stop doing it: we shall be fixed for ever in a universe of pure hatred.”

An attitude of charity and love is not something that comes naturally to any of us, And to make matters worse, for some of us, even comes even less naturally! But either way, we have to fight for it! We have to guard ourselves from believing that the perspective of our heart is TRUE Because if we don’t, we are going to cause relational fallout wherever we go, Which certainly includes the church.

One of the biggest reasons it harms us, One of the biggest reasons it’s so dangerous, is because this critical judgmental attitude, has a boomer effect upon ourselves, What am I talking about? I’m talking about what Jesus says in verse 2

² For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you.

Matthew 7:2 ESV

OK, first off, what does Jesus mean by judging? Does He mean that you identify something as sin? Does He mean you never use discernment? Does He mean you can’t have opinions on ANYTHING? The answer here is obviously, “no” That’s not what Jesus is saying.

On on hand, as we’ve already discussed, we absolutely should’t jump to conclusions and start calling everything and anything sin without even knowing the facts of the situation, But on the other hand, Jesus is saying not to draw conclusions about a person that condemns them. Because not only are we completely unqualified to do so, But we are claiming the right to do something that ONLY belongs to God, and God alone.

¹¹ Brothers and sisters, do not slander one another. Anyone who speaks against a brother or sister or judges them speaks against the law and judges it. When you judge the law, you are not keeping it, but sitting in judgment on it. ¹² There is only one Lawgiver and Judge, the one who is able to save and destroy. But you - who are you to judge your neighbor?

James 4:11-12 NIV

Similarly, in Luke 6:37

³⁷ “Judge not, and you will not be judged; condemn not, and you will not be condemned; forgive, and you will be forgiven;

Luke 6:37 ESV

And Romans 14:10

¹⁰ Why do you pass judgment on your brother? Or you, why do you despise your brother? For we will all stand before the judgment seat of God;

Romans 14:10 ESV

When it comes to wrongful judgment, I like how one pastor put it when he said: Wrongful judgment reduces someone down to a single action, Wrongful judgment reduces someone down to the way they look, Wrongful judgment reduces someone down to their failures and their past, Wrongful judgment reduces someone down to the ISSUE we disagree on, and why are we not to do that? BECAUSE not only do YOU not want to be judged in that way, But no matter how well we know the person WE DO NOT HAVE ALL OF THE FACTS! We do not know the entire story!

and yet, one encounter, one conversation, one thing they said about you, one theological disagreement is all you think you need to judge that person and determine their worth. Sure you might not say it that way, But that’s what your actions show. And actions speak louder than words.

Do you see the huge danger here? When you judge someone like that, what you are really saying is: “Lets do the law thing for EVERYBODY! “Let’s make things TOTALLY FAIR!” Which is exactly what the Pharisees wanted, and it’s because they thought they were righteous in God’s eyes. They thought they were upholding God’s law. But as Jesus keeps pointing out in the sermon on the mount, they don’t even come close! What does Jesus tell them?

²⁰ For I tell you, unless your righteousness exceeds that of the scribes and Pharisees, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.

Matthew 5:20 ESV

And then if that wasn’t shocking enough, Jesus goes on to show how their standard of righteousness, doesn’t even come CLOSE to matching God’s standard!

²¹ “You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not murder; and whoever murders will be liable to judgment.’ ²² But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment; whoever insults his brother will be liable to the council; and whoever says, ‘You fool!’ will be liable to the hell of fire.

Matthew 5:21-22 ESV

²⁷ “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ ²⁸ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

Matthew 5:27-28 ESV

YIKES! That’s some high-standard living! So high, that the rightful response to it is: “WHO THEN CAN BE RIGHTEOUS!” “WHO THEN CAN BE SAVED?”

And the answer is,

²⁶ But Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”

Matthew 19:26 ESV

And how is this possible? Through Christ and Christ alone!

¹⁷ “Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them.

Matthew 5:17 ESV

We have two options: Either we fulfill the law, or Christ fulfills it for us! Which is called: GRACE! And if we lawbreakers, whom I remind you deserve judgment and justice, have received said grace, How ya’ll think we should then treat each other in light of that marvelous unmerited gift? I don’t know, how about WITH unmerited GRACE, not judgment!

Do you wanna one of the biggest indicators that you haven’t received that marvelous grace? You don’t give it to others... Instead, you judge others by a standard you have asked God to not judge you by. Which is not only reverting back to the law, But it’s embracing blatant hypocrisy. Which leads us to our second point.

We must not swing the sword of judgment because it is:

2. Hypocritical (v. 3-4)

³ Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? ⁴ Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye?

Matthew 7:3-4 ESV

Jesus’s illustration here is pretty comical actually. He’s pointing out the blatant hypocrisy is the self-righteous judgment of one sinner over the next. Which is sort of like the pot telling the kettle it’s black... Or one armpit telling the other one it stinks.

Church, this is nothing other than the sin of self-righteousness, Which is no little sin, in fact, if you think about it, its the only sin that will damn you if not repented of! Don’t get me wrong, as Christians, we are self-righteous at times, but if we have never come to recognize our absolute need and dependence upon the grace of God for ALL of our righteousness Then we are NOT saved, no matter what we might think!

The truth is, we are ALL SINNERS who can ONLY be saved by the grace of God.

In Luke chapter 9, after a Samaritan village rejects Jesus, James and John, the sons of thunder, ask Him: “Lord, do you want us to command down fire from heaven and destroy them?” It was like they were saying: “Hey Jesus, can we wipe out the sinners now!?” And Jesus is like: “Yeah… I really don’t think you want that boys...” “Cuz that would absolutely include you too!”

The truth is, a judgmental spirit has forgotten the gospel. It’s forgotten that no matter how much you clean up the outside of the dish, No matter how much you whitewash the outside of the tomb, Without the gospel of MARVELOUS GRACE, the inside is full of dead man’s bones!

And when we look at other saves saints as SINNERS, who are worthy of our judgment, we have forgotten that it was the blood of CHRIST ALONE that washed our cups and made us white as snow!

May we NEVER forget that even the most nominal, weak, pathetic, Christian in this church is as HOLY, PERFECT, and SPOTLESS as God’s one and only Son, Jesus Christ.

Are you seeing your brothers and sisters in Christ as God sees them? Or are you viewing them self-righteously because you have an inflated view of your spiritual maturity? If so, remember Paul’s words in 1 Corinthians chapter 4.

⁷ For who makes you different from anyone else? What do you have that you did not receive? And if you did receive it, why do you boast as though you did not?

1 Corinthians 4:7 NIV

Are you perpetually concerned about the specks you see in your brothers eye while you have the log of legalism in your own? Then remember the gospel.

³² Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.

Ephesians 4:32 ESV

A heart that appreciates the grace it has received, WILL AND MUST EXTEND that same grace towards others, which then, and only then will allow our judgments to help and not harm one another. For grace-filled judgment is absolutely necessary for a church to be healthy and strong. Which leads us to our final point.

We must not swing the sword of judgment because it is:

3. Unhelpful (v. 5-6)

Matthew 7:5-6 (ESV) 5 You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.

One of the reasons we must not hastily swing the sword of judgment, is the same reason you wouldn’t want your surgeon to use a machete instead of a scalpel when cutting. It’s just not the most helpful tool for the job! And make no mistake, while we are not supposed to wrongly judge others, we are supposed to help others through righteous and discerning judgment! Which is why we have to read these verses together, otherwise we end up in a completely unhelpful situation!

Why do i say that? I say that because the Bible is crystal clear on the fact that we need to exercise righteous judgment in order to love one another better! Yes, we are certainly not to judge with a self-righteous, legalistic, hypercritical spirit,

See, if you have a cancerous tumor, what do you need? Not some jerk swinging huge sword at you, You need a surgeon who’s precision can cut the tumor out, without cutting YOU OUT. and if that’s going to happen, you need someone who has removed the log from their eye, in order to see clearly to remove the spec - or the small tumor - out of you.

But in order for this to happen, what does that surgeon have to recognize? They have to recognize the difference between the tumor and the person! Because if they don’t, they are going to start treating the person and the tumor as the same thing, Which is only going to harm, not help!

It is only by keeping our eyes upon the gospel of grace that we can, as one pastor put it, use the law of God as a mirror, instead of a window to self-righteously criticize others. But, with God’s law functioning as a mirror in our hands, We can then remove the log of legalism from our eyes, in order to lovingly remove the tumors we see in our brothers and sisters in Christ, and also then accept their help to remove our own.

Practical Application:

If your brother has something against you, leave your gift at the alter and go to them and be reconciled before the attitude of bitterness sets in!

Before you go to confront someone about a perpetual sin, pray for them at least 50 times!

If someone comes to you with an uncharitable narrative, SHUT THAT DOWN, and SHUT IT DOWN HARD

Ask people to examine you and invite them to be honest with how they think you’re doing in this area.

for the truth is, we all have SERIOUS and major blind spots when it comes to this ESPECIALLY WITH CERTAIN PEOPLE and certain personalty types. But last time I checked, a personality type isn’t a SIN! Maybe it’s just not your cup of tea, and you need to learn to make it your cup of tea despite YOUR PERSONALITY differences!

This is the love we are called to: Not legalistic judgment that Self-righteously hacks away at people instead of problems, But an attitude of grace that remembers the God of grace who gave up everything in order to save us.

How? By being born into a dangerous world some 2,000 years ago, in order to be wrongly judged by hypocrites, who saw Him as an unhelpful threat. As a enemy, instead of an ally who was there to harm them, not help them. And so in their rage they thrust a sword into His side as He lay there covered in blood, upon a cross, taking the judgment you and deserved. And because He did, we must not judge one another with unrighteous judgment church, But instead we must extend to each other the marvelous grace of God, as our hearts are taught to always sing:

“Grace, grace, God's grace, Grace that will pardon and cleanse within; Grace, grace, God's grace, Grace that is greater than all our sin!”

This is the manuscript the sermon was preached from, so the recording may differ in places.